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Phone buzzed. Text message.
What up, booty call.
We’ve already discussed the etiquette behind the call of booty, and as I started tidying up my house and making sure Project Runway was set to record, I began what SHOULD have been a simple text convo confirming that yes, I was up for something.
However, things took an unexpected turn for the douchiest worst and he went from go-to guy (for both orgasms and help hanging curtains) to lame-o worth neither my time nor my vagina.
WRONG ANSWER.
When a chick not only confirms she wants to fuck you, but makes it clear she wants to fuck you RIGHT NOW, you drop everything and fuck her. Seems simple, right? Common sense, yes?
Maybe he had a lineup of phone numbers ready to text in case the first one declined his offer and, like shopping for used cars, waited to see who dealt him the best deal — “A BJ and doggie style? I dunno, man…the place across the street threw in anal and agreed to waive the cuddling fee.”
But regardless he and I both know I was the top of the line, and to think I’d waste my time settling on what we’d do before he got to my house certainly failed to keep me wet.
The fun of it is anticipating his arrival, making small talk as the shoes come off, and then going at it with no holds barred. Who wants to plan it all out ahead of time?
Not me.
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